The Horror

Politics

Boris Johnson wins race to be Tory leader and PM

In his victory speech, Mr Johnson promised he would “deliver Brexit, unite the country and defeat Jeremy Corbyn”.

Well done Boris, you finally bumbled and lied your way into the top job.

You are the most unlikely person to unite this country, you are far more likely to be the last Prime Minister of the United Kingdom.

Ironic isn’t it, that it should be the Conservative and Unionist Party who just threw the union under a bus.

They care more about the fortunes of their party than the country, they elected Fuck Industry Johnson.

While they pretend they are scared of that useless old fool, Corbyn, they lack the honesty to say who they are really scared of, the populist leader of the tweed rebellion, Farage.

When Boris says “We are going to energise the country”, he means “Get ready for the race to the bottom”.

When he says “We are once again going to believe in ourselves”, I can only say “Speak for yourself mate”.

When Trump says “A really good man is going to be the prime minister of the UK now”, he means “We will so enjoy fucking you up the arse when most of your people are involved in the food riots and you crawl to us for a trade deal”.

At least Putin must be happy.

Quotes from a previous colleague, his “pooper scooper” at the Foreign Office

circus act

fly by the seats of his pants, haphazard style

the last person on Earth who would make any progress in negotiating with the EU at the moment

Well done Conservative and Unionist Party.